OPB Sunday Conversation

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Hey Look I was on OPB! I sat down with John Sepulvado for a chat about comedy, safe spaces, and women.  Click the Link to listen… or just read the cliff’s notes.

“Comedian Bri Pruett is widely considered to be one of the funniest people in Portland.

She’s also seen as a leader in Portland’s stand-up comedian community.

Pruett sat down with OPB’s Weekend Edition Host John Sepulvado.

She spoke about why stand-up comedy is economically better than being in a band. “My boyfriend is in a band and he has to pay out a whole band, and it’s a real bummer,” Pruett says. “And I’m glad to be light traveling, and doing whatever I want.”

Pruett also spoke about what she calls “the female comedy mafia” in Portland.

“The best shows in this city are run by women,” Pruett says. “And those women talk to each other. And if someone does something upsetting or misogynistic or transphobic or homophobic or racist, we talk about it.”

The comedian also spoke about the difference between joking about someone and picking on people.

“If someone came to me after a show and said, ‘hey, you really hurt my feelings with that joke,’” Pruett says. “I would absolutely look at my material and examine why that happened and be thoughtful about it.  And I would hope that all artists would be that way, but I know that that’s not the case.”

Let’s Do it with Bri Pruett: A Very Special Memorial Day Message About Faking Orgasm

Illustration by Erika Moen

Illustration by Erika Moen

Last summer, I was doing some SERIOUS online dating, but one Sunday night had me twisted.

It was a first date, and it was running long. I thought I’d have drinks, laughs, maybe a quick smooch, and be asleep by 10. Instead our long conversations and nervous flirting took forever to percolate. By the time we realized the chemistry was real and took things back to my place, it was 1:30 and our slow-to-start make out sesh turned irresistible and sexy and sleepy. I wasn’t trying to have sex (it’s the first date and I’m allowed to be traditional), but this was definitely fun and I was getting caught up in this guy. He’s hard as 10 rocks and moaning in desire and frustration, and it breaks me. So I change my mind and give consent, saying: “Okay, let’s get you off.” And he’s like: “But I want you to come.”

So there we are: He’s trying his best… but I’m not that close, and the pressure is mounting, and he’s asking if I’m close, and it’s got to be THREE IN THE GODDAMN MORNING! So I did what anyone would do, I closed my eyes, arched my back, moaned and successfully resisted the urge to say, “I’ll have what she’s having!” He pops his cork and I get my 40 winks, LIKE A PRO.

Why didn’t I just stop and tell the guy this wasn’t working? Answer: because that’s kinda scary! What if he got mad, or turned off, or never called me again, or all those things? Am I ruining everything my fore-parents fought for? Am I sacrificing a real human interaction for a polite one? Am I being PORTLAND PASSIVE in the worst context?

Look, I’m not proud. I know I’m setting unrealistic expectations for the dude. Plenty of Jezebel journalists have drawn lines in the sand re: orgasm faking, and they all make excellent points. You scream your head off, and then having experienced success, the dude or lady thinks “Wow! I sure am good at sex.” Then they go about their life, disappointing everyone they have the honor of bedding. Later the dude or lady thinks, “Geez what’s going on? ‘The left-handed tickler’ worked so well with _____, why isn’t this trick screaming to their deity of choice right now?“

If I inflate someone’s sexual ego, indirectly writing checks that his dick can’t cash… how is that my fucking problem?! Okay, you’re right, it takes a village to teach a guy how to fuck—but I’m no saint. Sometimes you have to take care of yourself and a faked orgasm is a white lie. It’s not really going to hurt anything. UNLESS YOU GET INTO A REAL RELATIONSHIP WITH THIS PERSON (more on that later).

We’re all looking for language, for etiquette, for guidelines about how to do this whole dating “thing.” You want permission to fake an orgasm with someone? Someone who you aren’t in a relationship with, who you only are casually fucking because it’s Sunday night and there are no more episodes of Mad Men. If you need permission, you got it, friendo!

But not if you’re in love. Because lying to your partner is lame. And more than one white lie is a real lie. Lies between you and your partner are really going to screw things up for your orgasms down the line… And intimacy and stuff.

In lieu of faking orgasms, learning how to fake orgasms, and debating the merits of faking it, we should REALLY be focusing on figuring out what gets us off, how to communicate that to our sexual partners and if the “getting-off” part is as important as we think? Have you guys made out with someone in the shower lately? DO IT!

Wishing you authentic orgasms and honest communication,
@Bri Pruett

Splitsider’s UP and COMING 2015!

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Look who’s dumb face is on the front page of Splitsider! This article gives props to the smaller comedy markets like Portland, Denver, Austin; showcasing amazing talent that hasn’t blown up nationally yet (like ya girl!). Follow all these folks, particularly Maggie Maye, Kristin Rand, Chris Cubas and Denver comic: Jordan Doll, who will be coming out for my weekly show, Earthquake Hurricane in July! Small Market Synergy!

Thanks to Splitsider and everyone’s support as I climb closer to those hot, Hollywood lights.

My Bridgetown Schedule!

http://www.bridgetowncomedy.com/performer/10189-bri-pruett

Dear lord I love Bridgetown Comedy Festival. It’s truly an honor to be invited.

PLEASE! COME WATCH ME THIS WEEKEND!

THURSDAY, May 7th – Let’s Do It w/ Bri Pruett

Rotture Lower – 8pm-9:30pm

FRIDAY, May 8th – Competitive Erotic Fan Fiction

Bossanova Ballroom – 11pm -12:30pm

SATURDAY, May 9th – Boogie Down

Boogie’s Burgers – 9:30pm-11pm

SUNDAY, May 10th – Keep Everywhere Weird

My Father’s Place – 7:30-9pm

Earthquake Hurricane in the Portland Monthly

Read about our hot hot show and come check us out before we get more crowded than BRUNCH http://www.portlandmonthlymag.com/arts-and-entertainment/articles/your-roadmap-to-portlands-comedy-scene-may-2015

Published in the Portland Monthly, April 27th, 2015 by Marty Patail

On a Wednesday night, 50 people squeeze into the basement of the Northeast Portland bike shop Velo Cult, a space no bigger than most living rooms. The crowd spills out the door in the back, beyond the bucket of crumpled $5 bills, where two comics hastily arrange to borrow a car to make a near-simultaneous gig across town. On stage, Curtis Cook grills a couple about their sex life, to raucous laughter.

This is Earthquake Hurricane, a weekly comedy showcase hosted by four hot local talents: Cook, Alex Falcone, Anthony Lopez, and Bri Pruett. Just two weeks after this show, a fire code violation forced the foursome to move. The crowds followed. If some art is a delicate flower, this slice of Portland comedy recalls Himalayan blackberry, spreading on a tough patch of soil.

This month, the eighth annual Bridgetown Comedy Festival will flood Portland venues with comics and comedy fans. An invitation to the festival remains a coveted badge of honor among local comics, even as Bridgetown has become more national than local. Of 124 comics performing this year, just 11 live in Portland. (In its first year, a third were locals.) That shift cements Portland as a comedy destination, but it also reflects health: the city’s comedy scene has become an everyday phenomenon, fizzing with the DIY energy and intimacy of events like Earthquake Hurricane. Local comics no longer need to rely on a single annual festival.

“It’s insane,” says Lopez, 27. “When I started out doing comedy six years ago, I could probably name 15, 20 local comics. Now there are so many opportunities.”

“It was sad,” adds Pruett, 31, who recalls awful experiences when the scene revolved around Harvey’s Comedy Club and a open mic at Suki’s, near PSU, notorious for its tough crowds. “We were performing for drunks. It was a dive bar scene.”

Now, the city has pollinated a distinct comedy personality, as a bootstrapping, any-show-anywhere ethos that welcomes diverse new voices. The EastBurn fills up Monday nights for It’s Gonna Be Okay, a feminist-leaning show. Curious Comedy Theater packs its auditorium for Lez Stand Up, a weekly LGBT-friendly show, and Minority Retort, for comedians of color. In Multnomah Village—not typically a nightlife destination—two female comics launched Spilt Milk “to escape housework and children.” Every so often, White Tiger Radio hosts an ultra-hip, 40-seat show in a garage on NE Killingsworth Street. Reversing the medium’s traditional male dominance, women run four of Portland’s top comedy shows.

“People are doing secret things,” says Pruett. “It’s like New York: there will be a show anywhere until the cops shut it down. We’re a real budding scene now that the fire marshal shut down our venue. We’ve made it.”

Not everyone who grabs a mic will be good. But rising tides raise all ships.

“There’s a natural ceiling here,” says Falcone. “If people get too hot, they bubble over and disappear to LA. But each time someone amazing graduates, another person ascends.”

At Earthquake Hurricane, Falcone introduces Shane Torres—one such recent “graduate”—who is back in town from Brooklyn for a week.

“Last year, he was Portland’s funniest comic,” Falcone says with a grin. “Now he’s New York’s twenty-thousandth funniest comic.”

KGW Talk Box

My comedy buddy Alex Falcone and I went to promote Late Night Action on KGW Live at 7! Reggie Aqui is so polished and cool, and I think we made him laugh, at least twice. I love him! Check out the video!

KGW Talk Box! Alex and Bri talk Late Night Action

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You missed our September addition with all the sweet guests in the picture, but you should come to the next Late Night Action with Alex Falcone at Mississippi Studios, October 27th at 8pm!

My Mark Driscoll Impression

You’ve probably seen something about misogynist ass hat Pastor Mark Driscoll in the news lately. His Mars Hill church has been accused of cult-like shaming behavior and institutional misogyny. Also misappropriating funds…whoops!

 

I thought it might be fun to reframe some things he’s been saying, allegedly, in private. Enjoy me saying dumb stuff! This guy is such a priiiiick!